Review: Rupinder Gill’s On the Outside Looking Indian

“How my second childhood changed my life”
On the Outside Looking IndianOn the Outside Looking Indian: How my second childhood changed my life
by Rupinder Gill
McClelland & Stewart (2011)
Like so many contemporary memoirs, On the Outside Looking Indian begins with a high-concept gimmick. The daughter of strict Indian parents in small-town Ontario, Rupinder Gill grew up watching television in her basement, never being allowed to experience supposed childhood milestones like slumber parties and karate classes. Now, having reached the doddering, wizened age of thirty, she plans to relive her lost youth. She compiles a list of goals — learning to swim, visiting Disney World, going to summer camp — and embarks on a second childhood: a madcap mission from which, of course, she will emerge stronger and smarter.

But this shallow, trite, and unbearably whiny memoir is based on a glaring fallacy. Gill seems to think there is some Platonic ideal of a normal childhood, and is outraged that her parents — who, although stern and traditional, were loving and engaged — deprived her of this Elysian adolescence. The irony, of course, is that this is a construct shaped by her years in front of the hypnotic television; every time she mentions an experience she missed, she uses an example from television to illustrate her point. Unfortunately, she lacks the self-awareness to recognize the flaws in her own world view.

Her prose is competent enough, but it relies too often on clichés (many pairs of birds are killed with single stones), vague platitudes, and failed attempts at self-deprecating humour. The text itself is as punny as the title. As she ambles through her adolescent to-do list, her account takes on an uneven, meandering tone. A stint as a camp counsellor for kids with cancer — rendered with saccharine, Chicken Soup–style earnestness — is followed up with a sojourn to New York, featuring all the tired, cheeky tropes one might expect to see in a single-girl-takes-Manhattan narrative from 1999. Always present, however, are notes of self-indulgent petulance and alarming disrespect toward both her culture and her parents.

The experience of a traditional Indian upbringing in a North American context offers rich territory for reflection, and certain moments, like Gill’s visit to India, or the jarring differences between the ironclad rule under which she was raised and her younger brother’s more lenient upbringing, beg for deeper insight. Instead, the cultural analysis is limited to broad strokes and crass generalizations. “Indian parents have a deathly fear of sexuality,” she gripes, in between calling her Punjabi “gibberish” and rolling her eyes at her mother’s traditional cooking. Her parents, meanwhile, are reduced to stock sitcom villains who have the gall to clothe her in non–brand name jeans. In attempting to illustrate the restraints imposed by her culture, Gill’s memoir only manages to expose her own narrow-mindedness.

12 comment(s)

S RaiApril 10, 2011 22:20 EST

I have read this book, and I don\'t understand this review at all. I am Indian, and I completely relate to the experiences and feelings the author conveys in the book. Gill is hilarious and I, and my husband, laughed out loud when we each read the book. I also thought she conveyed her parents as being hard-working and self-sacrificing even though they were strict. This review seems almost personal in nature——it is hard to believe Landau could have this much hate towards a total stranger. Personally, I am happy to see more Indo-Canadian writers having a voice and sharing the experiences and realities that so many children of immigrants (not just Indian) in Canada.

TanApril 11, 2011 13:40 EST

First, a disclaimer - I work for Gill's publisher. I'm also a white, middle class, nth generation Canadian.

Be that as it may, I really enjoyed this book and I'm disappointed the reviewer disliked it so much. Like S. Rai, this book made me laugh out loud.

This is a memoir about childhood - and children are whiny. And yes, many of Gill's ideas about the North American childhood are based on TV. But so were mine. I grew up in a single-parent household where brand names were out of reach and free babysitting was expected. I watched a lot of TV. And despite loving and respecting my mom, I often thought she was out of touch with my "reality".

But it's also a memoir about setting goals, no matter where they might spring from, and accomplishing them. I cheered for Gill as she found her dancing feet and wished her luck on a move to New York - a move that friends of mine have been contemplating with various degrees of intent. It also encouraged me, at the wizened age of 30, to take a look at all of the projects I have going on and pick a few to accomplish this year. It really does add to your sense of self-worth.

Whatever lens we view childhood through leaves a lasting mark on our adult lives. I was able to see through those lovely heart-shaped glasses and share the humour, warmth and spirit in this book.

ChildBearingHippoApril 11, 2011 20:32 EST

Yikes. What a review from a 'critic' with an obvious axe to grind. It's surprising she didn't enjoy the book's petulance and whining considering that's all she gives us here. Thanks for redefining the word "prétentieux".

JenniferApril 13, 2011 17:52 EST

A critical review is fine, but I agree, this feels mean.

DeborahApril 13, 2011 23:36 EST

I think the reviewer didn't like the book and was honest about that in her review. That's not mean; it's her job. For an example of meanness, see childbearinghippo's comment.

PKIApril 14, 2011 22:24 EST

I just finished this book and I can't wait to read more from this author. She is hilarious! She is so self-deprecating and witty, I really enjoyed reading about her second childhood adventures. There are a lot of great funny people coming out of Canada (witness all the best comedians in the States) and she seems headed to be one of them.

I was really disappointed by this review in the Walrus. While Ms. Landau is certainly entitled to her opinion—-it ought to be a literary critique not an opinion related to her personal judgments. Calling someone "trite and shallow" or "lacking self-awareness" is not a literary review. It must be difficult for new writers like Rupinder to face these types of attacks—-I wonder how Ms. Landau would feel in her place. First she would need to get a book actually published rather than just insulting others.

AmanApril 25, 2011 22:53 EST

Bravo, Ms. Landau. I have read excerpts from the book but I am put off by the author's self-indulgence. What does she know of her parent's constraints? Under what conditions did they bring her up, and what did they sacrifice along the way, Only to be made two bit cartoon characters in this self-doubting and self-indulgent book. To me, a first generation immigrant from India, it shows the smallness of the world that the author inhabits. Pity her and many more Indo-Canadians who cannot seem to get out of the smallness of their worlds.

another viewMay 05, 2011 13:46 EST

I was looking forward to reading this book and was disappointed early on. Quotes like "I grew up in a town whiter than snow", "only two other Indians in our primary school" "In high school there were a few other Indian kids at my school. They all hung out together" and "didn't understand why I couldn't have it all."

These quotes are extremely exaggerated. Growing up Indian at Grand River Collegiate in Kitchener in the early 1990s was not all that bad. Sure there were comments about facial hair and those who did not understand some of the rules at our Indian homes, but our teachers were amazing and helped us learn about North American culture and helped our "white" friends learn a lot about us as well. As an aside, there were many other "colours" at our school as well, including at least a dozen Indian families.

I did not have any Indian friends either, but felt like I had a full experience within my own culture. I don't want to be who I am not, and while just like Rupinder I went to Disney as my first vacation from my full time professional job, I much preferred the family time growing up together, living within our means, having money for rich life experiences you can only have when you are a child.

Things are not always better on the inside, and now that my family is gone, I would much rather be outside looking Indian with them, then without them!

kergiMay 30, 2011 16:23 EST

I read the book and being indian myself, was quite aghast by how much she's stereotyped my culture and how she has absolutely no real understanding of why an Indian family works the way it does.
I completely agree with the reviewer's point of view.

NLJune 08, 2011 12:57 EST

As an Indian girl that grew up very similar to Gill, I absolutely agree with this review.
The idea that we should value one childhood over another upsets me greatly.

JetJune 15, 2011 12:32 EST

I disagree. I’m Indian and I though this book was pretty funny.

I didn’t take it too seriously and simply looked at it as one person’s story rather than comparing it to mine or the experiences of all second generation Indians living in Canada.

Plus, I felt this book was more about getting older with unfulfilled goals than it was about being Indian anyway.

Niranjana IyerJune 27, 2011 21:56 EST

I felt this review revealed the reviewer's implicit bias on what immigrant writing "should" be like. Immigrant writing isn’t just about subalterns reflecting on being the Other; we also chat about the fallout of non-brand name jeans on our teen selves.

“Always present, however, are notes of self-indulgent petulance and alarming disrespect toward both her culture and her parents.”

This is quite infuriating. If a “normal” Canadian dissed her cultural experiences as a teen, I bet a review wouldn’t call her “alarmingly disrespectful” for it. A reviewer wouldn’t wonder why a “normal” Canadian didn’t react with moderation, if, say, her mom didn’t allow her to attend a Hannah Montana concert when all her friends were going. Landau seems to imply that Gill must be held to a different standard of behavior because of her ethnicity.
And anyway, how did Landau miss the obvious affection Gill has for her parents? Towards the end, Gill writes, “When I was growing up, I had always wished they were more supportive, more understanding, that they might have said "I love you" just once. But now I knew that they had done what they could, and that it was time I did right by them, for they had had neither the childhoods nor the adulthood they might have wanted for themselves.” Not exactly disrespectful, that.

The book does have its shortcomings—Gill often projects her issues with her parents on the India itself, and her stereotypes of the country grate. But this review does not even attempt go beyond the reviewer's own limited notions of Indo-Canadian writing's scope or tone. This blinkered piece does the author and her potential readers a huge disfavor.

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